Dazed and confused

I had a bizarre week.I bought summer boots that I might wear morrow.But thats not the point of view.After work I walked from Cihangir thru Çukurcuma to Galatasaray and went to Bershka today.I bought a grey bracelet that matches my gray vintage bag color.I also bought summer boots.I don't feel good these days.I even want to get out of my life.Be off the record for ...like...for a while or forever maybe?I am bored of everything and everyone and every place.This must be something at the moment but no.The feeling doesn't leave me alone.Maybe I'm homesick(even I am at my home).Maybe I need to hug my mom.But I can't.I need to call her more often.Maybe I need to get drunk with my palz.Or I need myself.I am the only cure for myself.I make strong words that I believe in and then I say that I am strong and I can move on.I don't like to think about future but I feel like I must plan and go or I'll end up wasted.I've been wasting my precious time like for 5 years.That is a killer idea.It kills me for two days.I am like between nowhere.I don't want to do anything.I guess I need a solution.in my mind.I need to solve.maybe its too late.maybe I can't really solve anything.Thats why I'm lost.Totally lost.I'm very very...dazed and.confused.